Guide to surviving the office party

The silly season has begun, and for some strange reason, people lose their minds around this time. There may be many reasons for the loss of inhibitions but the obvious one is too much alcohol. So my intention is to give you the VKATZ guide to getting through the office party with your dignity intact.

So, with the holidays comes the flooding of invitations to the various year-end functions, and the one that you are looking forward to is the office party. I mean why not? You’ve worked hard the entire year; put up with the usual office bullshit, so now is your time. The boss is actually doing something for you for a change.

  1. So, what do you wear? My suggestion is to always keep it classy and professional, this is not a night out with the girls. There is absolutely no reason for the twins to come out to play, so, stay away from that number you have at the back of the wardrobe, you know the one!! The one that only comes out when it’s time to prey. The office party is not a buffet for sampling the office folk, trust me, you don’t want to. It generally leaves a bad taste in the mouth.
Oufit-1 outfit-2 outfit-3

2.Keep conversations light, topics that should be off-limits centre around religion and politics., and for heaven’s sake, stay away from flirting with your colleagues, you don’t want to say or do something you are going to regret. I remember many years ago when I was working corporate, conferences and office parties were the breeding grounds for incest. Your aim is to maintain a professional manner at all times. Remember, respect takes ages to gain, but a split second to lose.

  1. Moving on to the alcohol, yes it’s been a tough year and no one needs to unwind more than you. Let’s just keep the unwinding for the girlfriends. Alcohol makes people all kinds of stupid, been silly is fine, but been silly amongst work colleagues is asking for trouble. There is no reason why should not enjoy yourself. My suggestion is to team up with someone you trust and work a buddy system. You are both responsible for each other and the aim is to warn each other if things are getting out of hand.
  1. Food is very important in any function. Have you ever noticed that when you attend a function, most people remember the food? Strange! Now at your party food is your friend, especially when you are consuming alcohol, so tuck in. We all know what happens when we drink on an empty tummy.

The food is there to be eaten at the party, please do not be one of those people that wraps food up in a paper towel and throws it into the bag for later. This, my friend, is not cool.

5. Dancing, hmm, well this is a topic that needs its very own blog. At no point should you be busting moves like Jagger, Michael Jackson, or the Spices girls. Keep it tidy.

  1. And finally, the time to leave. You do not have to be the life of the party and see the last person out. Remember, the aim is to leave with your dignity intact, so if you are feeling like things could take a wrong turn, leave. Otherwise, be polite, stay for the formalities, and leave when you notice most of the other people leaving.

Now that you survived the office party with your dignity intact, no one is stopping you from meeting the girls and letting your hair loose.

Tags : #christmas #office party